I think I have finally gotten to the bottom of my inability to toss things out....it is fear! Fear I will forget whole chapters of my life. My hard drive is not what it used to be and although there are plenty of things I would like to forget, I have been blessed in this life and have a lot of things I want to remember. Maybe this is a librarian thing, but getting rid of books is the hardest. Good grief I have my psychology book from Psych 101 to this day. I read every dang word in that book and highlighted about 1/4 of them. I like looking back through every 10 years or so. Why? I don't know!! If I get rid of this book maybe it will be like it never happened. Now that we have the Internet this is all insanity. Plus we have amazing data bases at school and World Book online! I have got to get with it....
Once we were cleaning out and accidentally threw out a box with several essay tests from college, a term paper from high school and an essay from Jr. High on "Patience"....(we had to pick out the most important trait a person could have.) I thought that was pretty well thought out and well written and would like to have it to show the students at school a sample of my work at their age. I had some blue book tests from American Literature....and I thought the ideas that popped into my head were rather amazing. We were never sure what we were gonna have to write about so it was amazing to me they turned out as well as they did and surprisingly I usually got an A....if my miserable spelling didn't do me in. I once wrote a test on J.D. Salinger's short story, "A Good Day for Banana Fishing"....I think that was the name of the story and I misspelled "banana" the entire way through. I think I had an extra ana or something...hahaha. I once wrote boweling for bowling. That was my most embarrassing essay....hahaha.
Back to this cleaning out fear....I also have boxes of cassette taped sermons from all sorts of people. I used to listen to sermons all the time. It was like I couldn't get enough of them. I had a lot of questions and these tapes were ways I answered some. Now some are good and sound theology, but in hind sight some of these might be a bit off....too much word of faith theology, but they kept the eyes of my heart and mind on Jesus and for them I am thankful. I guess I need to cull through these three boxes and keep a few that mean a lot to me. But some how it is difficult to pitch out Kay Arthur's teachings and Dudley Hall.....Dudley was with James Robinson and was one of my favorites. I finally got to meet him and he is just a regular guy... that is what I like so much. I have some Billy Spinks tapes, too. He was a friend of the Boersmas and his sermons were always enlightening, sound, and balanced.
Although, many of these tapes are old and brittle. One even wrecked a tape player I have. It got all tangled up and messed it up. So did I throw out the tape player, you ask. Heck no! It has a radio that works fine and I use it in the am to listen to WAFR as I put my face on. hahaha....I guess if you want to say something good about me and my hording problem....I am not wasteful.
What is sad is some day someone will come in here with a bulldozer and it will be gone. I remember when my Grandmother died and her desk was FULL of every birthday card she ever got. I guess I come by this thing naturally. Every once and a while I will happen across a letter or card someone has written to me and it really made my day. I had even forgotten that act of kindness.. so I am conflicted. I wish I had the ability to just keep it all in my mind.
Is there an anti hording drug? Maybe Prozac helps with this ....hahaha. I keep thinking of manna. I would have been trying to keep some for sure. I think some of my happiest days were when I had two pairs of Levi jeans, a couple dresses, a good warm coat and some chukka boots and some cute tops...and 10 books and a radio and a typewriter....and of course my earth shoes I wore every day all day .....and my camera. I have always had a camera near....but I could fit it all into one room and one closet easily and I was perfectly happy. Oh...I did have a stereo and couple orange crates FULL of a wide variety of albums....everything from Brubeck and Bach to Frank Zappa. All of it fit in the back of a Chevy station wagon....now I would need a huge truck and I am not even counting furniture. If I were in college today it would probably be different. I didn't even have car then....weren't allowed until Jr. year. Yes, less is better, I have no doubt, but yet I can't seem to whittle it down. Back to the stuff.....
P.S. I can pretty much guess what fellow blogger, Lora, will have to say about all of this. She doesn't have the hording gene....she has the pitch it out gene. I guess she has a better memory than I do or something.
Once we were cleaning out and accidentally threw out a box with several essay tests from college, a term paper from high school and an essay from Jr. High on "Patience"....(we had to pick out the most important trait a person could have.) I thought that was pretty well thought out and well written and would like to have it to show the students at school a sample of my work at their age. I had some blue book tests from American Literature....and I thought the ideas that popped into my head were rather amazing. We were never sure what we were gonna have to write about so it was amazing to me they turned out as well as they did and surprisingly I usually got an A....if my miserable spelling didn't do me in. I once wrote a test on J.D. Salinger's short story, "A Good Day for Banana Fishing"....I think that was the name of the story and I misspelled "banana" the entire way through. I think I had an extra ana or something...hahaha. I once wrote boweling for bowling. That was my most embarrassing essay....hahaha.
Back to this cleaning out fear....I also have boxes of cassette taped sermons from all sorts of people. I used to listen to sermons all the time. It was like I couldn't get enough of them. I had a lot of questions and these tapes were ways I answered some. Now some are good and sound theology, but in hind sight some of these might be a bit off....too much word of faith theology, but they kept the eyes of my heart and mind on Jesus and for them I am thankful. I guess I need to cull through these three boxes and keep a few that mean a lot to me. But some how it is difficult to pitch out Kay Arthur's teachings and Dudley Hall.....Dudley was with James Robinson and was one of my favorites. I finally got to meet him and he is just a regular guy... that is what I like so much. I have some Billy Spinks tapes, too. He was a friend of the Boersmas and his sermons were always enlightening, sound, and balanced.
Although, many of these tapes are old and brittle. One even wrecked a tape player I have. It got all tangled up and messed it up. So did I throw out the tape player, you ask. Heck no! It has a radio that works fine and I use it in the am to listen to WAFR as I put my face on. hahaha....I guess if you want to say something good about me and my hording problem....I am not wasteful.
What is sad is some day someone will come in here with a bulldozer and it will be gone. I remember when my Grandmother died and her desk was FULL of every birthday card she ever got. I guess I come by this thing naturally. Every once and a while I will happen across a letter or card someone has written to me and it really made my day. I had even forgotten that act of kindness.. so I am conflicted. I wish I had the ability to just keep it all in my mind.
Is there an anti hording drug? Maybe Prozac helps with this ....hahaha. I keep thinking of manna. I would have been trying to keep some for sure. I think some of my happiest days were when I had two pairs of Levi jeans, a couple dresses, a good warm coat and some chukka boots and some cute tops...and 10 books and a radio and a typewriter....and of course my earth shoes I wore every day all day .....and my camera. I have always had a camera near....but I could fit it all into one room and one closet easily and I was perfectly happy. Oh...I did have a stereo and couple orange crates FULL of a wide variety of albums....everything from Brubeck and Bach to Frank Zappa. All of it fit in the back of a Chevy station wagon....now I would need a huge truck and I am not even counting furniture. If I were in college today it would probably be different. I didn't even have car then....weren't allowed until Jr. year. Yes, less is better, I have no doubt, but yet I can't seem to whittle it down. Back to the stuff.....
P.S. I can pretty much guess what fellow blogger, Lora, will have to say about all of this. She doesn't have the hording gene....she has the pitch it out gene. I guess she has a better memory than I do or something.
1 comment:
Look in the Psych 101 book and see if WAY BACK IN THE DARK AGES they knew about OCD. If not, I suggest you google it. Could it possibly be-that hording might be a symptom???????
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